pausing the non-stop cavalcade

Retarius you have gone, blog deleted. Damn. I hate it when that happens. You inspired me. I miss you, and I keep reading other people's blogs, and they are missing you too.

If blogging was a library of books, shelves full of objects made of paper with printed words, then we might occasionally lose a book we liked, or throw it out with the trash. I have lent books and not got them back, left books in holiday rooms, lost them on trains, that kind of thing, but it would have to be a rare occasion that I would lose something totally irreplaceable.

I suppose my most precious book is my grandmother's bible, the one made of wood from the mount of olives, the red-letter bible with coloured prints and early photographs of arab Jerusalem. I spilt ink on it once and carefully removed the stain after my mother howled in protest. It's the best restoration I ever did of anything. If I lost that I would be very sad. This is how I feel when a favourite blog just disappears.

It's not like blogs are books - you can just get another copy from the store. It's this interwebnet. We take it for granted, until it just ain't there anymore and blogger says "Not Found". I suppose the artist has the power to destroy the work.

I realised that the internet being the leaky place it is, I still had some of your brilliant writing. I also figured today, someone was going to grab your name, this subdomain of blogspot, eventually, at random, and that I couldn't bear that, so I decided to put what stuff I have of yours here, until you return, should you so decide. I hope this doesn't offend anyone. I speak as a fan.

You once wrote in my comments,

i don't know much, but i *do* know that stuff you just wrote right there...that is not a blog post...that is pure fucking literature. -- Posted by retarius to Blog of Funk at 1/19/2005 01:44:41 PM

Retarius, thanks for that great kindness, and for the many observations and comedy and pathos in your frequently brilliant blog.

I don't know why you pulled the plug, what your life circumstances are, it's a total mystery to me your disappearance from this strange world of writing, but anyway, come back, if you can, and write more, I really enjoy your stuff, and so do many other people. We miss you. I hope you don't mind me keeping what I have of yours around for others to read in your absence.

Finally please forgive my sentimentality and this tribute, I just got a fit of the blues, and I thought about something you wrote which changed me.

Retarius - hic et ubique - say something dammit!

cheers,

Deek.

PS: It will take me a few days to post what I have.