Friday, April 29, 2005

abattoir and costello

what the hell is up with chicks? how the hell am i supposed to be the guy they want when *THEY* don't know what they want? they want a tough man who can protect them, but they want a guy who is gentle and tender. at least i thought that is what they want. boy was i wrong.

i was on a date and blew it with this chick, cause i guess i was too "in touch" with my feelings, or whatever, and i cried during a movie, and i can only assume that is what turned her off to me.

i am a pretty manly macho kind of guy. i have lots of hair on my back, i curse like a sailor, i'll drink and come to fisticuffs for just a wrong glance, and have been kicked out of church on more than one occasion for drunken brawling.

but even with all that, i am tender, and i guess showing her my soft side was too much for this chick to handle. she came over for dinner and a movie, and even though the dinner went ok, during the movie i let my tough exterior fade for a few seconds, i cried at the end of the movie, and i can only assume she just didn't want a pansy for a boyfriend.

i rented the movie slam it in every hole and there is a scene at the end with two guys who are fucking this girl, one from behind while she blows the other one. well, at the climactic end when they stand on either side of her and she is on her knees, bravely jerking them both off with all she has, they both blow thier loads on her face simultaneously. this scene, with the emotion, and the soundtrack pulling at your heartstrings in the background, was just too much for me, and i got all choked up and cried. what can i do, i am only human.

so she abruptly ended the date and told me not to call her anymore. if only i could find a woman who can appreicate a tender guy with feelings such as myself.

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